Session 0-3

Greeting fellow nerds! It has been awhile since I have posted a D&D story for you all! Due to the large amount of time from the game I ran, we decided to start a new campaign. This is going to be a little bit of a long post as we’re about 3 sessions in so far, but I promise you it is an amazing read.

Behold, the story of a rag tag group of adventurers and the Realm of the Mad Mage.

I, my readers, am an Elven doctor. My gnome partner and I were forced from our city by a dwarven attack. No one knows why they are suddenly turning on the other races at this moment but it was not fun to be displaced. The gnome and I managed to make it to Swelterguard. It is a small town that borderd the Domain of the Mad Mage. A little fact I know about this place is, power mages create these realms for them. But something made this one go insane. Poor fool.

Here in Swelterguard, I meet up with the rest of my party. Most having a similar story. Displacement by dwarves. There is another gnome who fancies magical spells. There is also a Dreugar who hates these dwarves with a passion and is really into dirt or something. Last, but not least, a human. I don’t know a lot about him at this point but that’s ok I guess.

I forgot to mention, the other gnome? Has a weird thing for my assistant. It’s weird but kind of amusing. But we can’t be distracted by love at this point. Gelfi, my gnome assistant and nurse, and I set up a make shift doctors tent to treat the injured. I’d rather see them stay ill but I rather enjoy money.

The last customer I had was strange. She came to me and held out a leaf filled with mud. She told me her husband bought it from the witch for fertility. I scoffed. “That is just mud” I told her she told me “I KNEW IT” before storming off. Poor man…

As the day ends, the magician comes back to us and tells us of a witch on the end of town that sells talisman, spells and protection. Weird…but they all want to go so we’re off to the edge of town to see this witch. It was clear that this town doesn’t like her. But how bad can she really be? *sigh*

As soon as we get there, there is man standing outside, he looks defeated. It wasn’t too much longer before we heard yelling and screaming inside the witches house. I went to see what was going on. I found a patient I had told hr husband bought mud. Oh boy…I tried to explain magic to this human and it could have been magic, but from a medical standpoint it’s mud. She scoffs and walks off. I am alone with this insane witch of a woman now.

The group enters the cabin as the couple leave and she starts to try to sell us her wares. The weird talisman, she said, would protect us from the realm so we can travel safely across into the lands. Being that she sold mud to a man, I turned down her offer. The duergar wasted their money on one. I felt confident that I could handle the realm. How bad can this be? We stand at the border now. I cross over…

I can feel it…it feels strange….unnerving…..As I cross the border it feels like a gust of wind blowing down on me before I am into the Realm of the Mad mage. It’s strange to me,…the sky is blue and pink and the clouds are moving very fast. The grass blows in the breeze shifting through the colors of the rainbow… The dirt dwarf? Saw nothing. It was normal to him.

We go to enter the cave, but the not Gelfi gnome doesn’t want to enter. I shrug it off. I really don’t care as I go inside. He tells us he’s going to find the crawfish and talk to them. Alrighty then…. He successfully finds the crawfish he was looking for and casts talk to animal on them. They tell him to go away and not to eat him. He informs them he doesn’t want to eat them and that he wants to talk to them about the mud here. They are just little babies and go fetch the eldest crawfish. The old man Crawdad explains he is the oldest and he has millions of children here and that the gnome can take the mud id he wants. Being around 30 minutes old, he has seen the everything there is to see and his millions of children will carry on his legacy. The gnome thanks him for his time, collects some mud and goes back to the cave we are in.

Fast forward a bit of time, we accidentally slaughtered (By slaughter I mean the human sliced the fucking thing in half) a pseudodragon and the human rushed his body to the military cleric who revived him. I later learned there are mushrooms that create neurotoxins and he was affected by them because he ate the mushroom…he acted like the witch who ALSO eats them. I tell the party they are poison and will fuck them up.

When we return to the town, the Dreugar tells us he is going to visit the mage which is fine. The DM shifts the story to them. It is now a pretty fun time. The witch starts to make soup with the mushrooms he brought back and she offers him some of the stew. He eats said stew. OOC I just stare at them and say “Didn’t I just tell you it was poison?!” I laughed, they laughed, the party laughed and they successfully rolled to save against the poison. Sure pays to be a type of dwarf.

Nothing else really happens from here. So skipping a few days after I find out I can make stuff last forever, I tell the commander i can help to help ease debt ect ect. I’m also totally fine letting everyone but a select few die from the dwarves but that’s just me. It is from there I hear the dwarves want to have a meeting. Oh no!!! We wait for the day of the meeting. As we await to see what happens….a weird woman appears. She tells us she’s the apprentice of the Mad Mage.

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